Happy "Effin’" Valentine’s Day



Valentine’s Day is over-rated, full of disappointment, and now just a lot of WORK.  Obviously, cupid’s arrow missed me this year.

I’ve never real been a big fan of Valentine’s Day…and I’m happily in LOVE.  See, I don’t want flowers, candy, cards, etc. on Valentine’s Day…I want them EVERYDAY!  Well, not everyday…just any other day.  I prefer my main squeeze to remember me ON HIS OWN without the pressure of a romantic holiday (which he does pretty well).  We do exchange cards on Valentine’s Day…but that’s it.  No gifts, no candy, no jewelry, no dinners out, nothing.  You may ask…why even get cards?  Well, we have a thing with greeting cards…can’t really explain it.

I polled my Facebook friends on what to do with my kids…gift vs. no gift.  I mean, seriously, my kids have enough crap as it is.  Do I really want to add adorable pink or purple stuffed animals holding a heart or other tacky tchotchkes (yeppers, a silent “t” on that one…learned something new today) to our toy bin?  Nope.

So I ended up finding two cute purses/bags for the girls on clearance at Wal-Mart for $3 – one Tinker Bell and one Princesses.  And with the latest obsession they have for girlie purses = perfect match.  And our Play-Doh from Christmas is almost not quite playable anymore.  So I filled the purses with Play-Doh which I was going to buy anyway.  My kids also have an obsession with tissues – so I added some decorative V-Day tissue packets and then a V-Day M&M treat.  Great gift, right?  Wrong.

Stella has been loving Tink lately, so that one was hers.  But, of course, it’s a Monday morning and she’s all tired and ungrateful and “I want the PRINCESSES” at the top of her lungs with tears streaming down her face.  Which makes me want to take Cupid’s arrow and stick her with it (I wouldn’t really do that).  And Andy grabs her gift and gets all “…you better respect your mother and the hard work she put into your Valentine gift…do you want me to take it away” on her.

In the meantime Charlotte is trying to protect her Princess purse from Stella while stacking the Play-Doh containers as high as possible and then knocks them all over the counter and the floor.  And I’m trying to sort through the 1000 Valentines and teacher gifts I have to take to daycare.  Luckily, I remembered we were going to be out of town all last weekend and I had Stella work on signing her name to all 30 cards over the past two weeks…see, this holiday is WORK.

Andy finally looks at me and mouths, “Happy Effin’ Valentine’s Day”…exactly. But I did LOVE his card…he picked another good one…as he always does.


6 Responses to Happy "Effin’" Valentine’s Day

  1. How do we remain friends, seriously? I am wearing a red shirt and heart shaped earrings. My little ones are wearing hearts. Everyone got a handmade construction paper heart with their name and descriptive words (only the nice ones this time) on it like huggable, loved, talented, etc. Howie bought them each a marshmallow heart. He and I just got each other cards, as well. The kids will get a book that is specific to their likes later tonight and I’ll be mushy all day, damn it.
    I agree, demonstrating love shouldn’t just be on a holiday. I also agree that little stuffed animal, knick-knacky stuff is annoying. But I am trying to enjoy another day that reminds me to be thankful and a little sweeter. To you my dear friend…Happy Effin’ Valentines Day. 🙂

  2. Well I am with Krista!!! – Anna picked out a red shirt for me, red shirt for Rob, and red and white shirt for Nolan and she has on her heart dress! They had their cards and pez dispsensers this morning. But I was afriad of the morning meltdown, so I gave them their disney stuffed animal yeaterday afternoon so they had time to play with them and advoid a meltdown this morning. And I will be making heart shaped pancakes for dinner tonight!

  3. Hilarious! I do dress myself and the kids in red. Paul respectfully declined the red collared shirt I placed out for him. Kids get a Pez dispenser, their favorite chocolate bar and a card. Paul & I exchange cards. He gets chocolate and I always get roses. Predictable, but enjoyable.
    We have moved away from mush cards to comical ones because we could use the laugh. I think this year me to him went something like:
    As I gaze into your eyes this Valentine’s Day I want so much to tell you….(open card) You’re damn lucky!
    Hopelessly romantic, even after 13 years of marriage. HAHA

  4. I”m way late in responding, but this one made me laugh out loud! You know I loathe most holidays and the work that gets dumped on the mom’s and the fact that mom’s thus rarely get the same enjoyment as the participants thanks to working our butts off first. DH and I don’t celebrate v-day either and we have a card thing too – we loathe them thanks to his mother and sister sending out cards for every tiny little thing we are burnt out. Although, cards from the kids are wonderful since they hand make them and write very sweet things!

    The exchange btwn Andy and Stella was my favorite part though as I can so picture the whole thing!

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